When Feedback Shakes Your Leadership Foundation: How Building Inner Authority Strengthens Confidence

Someone questions your thinking in a meeting, and it hits harder than it should.

The feedback wasn't harsh. You weren't unprepared.

But, in that moment, it feels like your credibility is on the line.

After the meeting, instead of moving forward, you start polling other people.

“What do you think?”

“Would you change this?”

Not to improve the work, but to quiet the doubt.

The Hidden Pattern Behind Second-Guessing After Feedback

Underneath this reaction is a simple, familiar thought:

“I don’t want to look stupid or incompetent. I have to get this right.”

This belief shows up most often in experienced leaders - directors, VPs, and executives who care deeply about their work and their reputation.

And it quietly undermines their leadership impact, in subtle, energy-draining ways

• Work gets over-edited.

• Decisions get delayed.

• Conviction gets outsourced.

  
  

Over time, self-assurance erodes, despite proven expertise and capability. Because they stop trusting their own judgment under pressure.

How Building Inner Authority Strengthens Confidence

Many leaders assume this is a confidence issue.

It’s not.

It’s an inner authority issue.

Inner authority is a skill most leaders were never taught.

What Is Inner Authority?

Inner authority is the ability to trust your own judgment, even when you’re challenged.

It doesn’t mean ignoring feedback, or being rigid or defensive.

It means staying steady enough to evaluate input without collapsing, over-explaining, or spiraling into second-guessing yourself.

When inner authority is shaky, you don’t lose credibility in loud ways.

It leaks quietly through over-editing, over-explaining, outsourcing conviction, or backing down under pressure.

How This Affects Leadership Credibility

Leaders with strong technical skills but weak inner authority often experience:

• lingering self-doubt after meetings

• rumination that drains time and energy

• reduced influence when challenged

• a growing gap between responsibility and confidence

Colleagues can feel it. And over time, it weakens their trust in your leadership.

Building inner authority strengthens people's confidence in you.

Inner Authority Is Learnable

Inner authority isn’t a personality trait. It’s not something you either have or don’t.

It’s a learnable capability, built through self-reflection, embracing the value you bring, having a clear POV and practicing the communication skills that project calm conviction.

The shift happens when leaders stop asking, “How do I avoid being wrong?”And start asking, “How do I stay centered on what's most important?”

That distinction changes everything.

A Question to Reflect On

After receiving feedback or being challenged, which pattern shows up most for you?

• You replay it and second-guess yourself

• You seek more input than you actually need

• You move forward, but the doubt lingers

  
  

Noticing the pattern is the first step toward changing it.

Want to Go Deeper?

If you’re a senior leader who wants to strengthen inner authority, especially in high-stakes conversations, start by understanding your values and strengths. Click here to download my Discover Your Values & Strengths workbook.